Why not be ashamed to have a relationship with a man younger than yourself
Have you ever noticed for yourself that when friends talk about their new boyfriend, the message that he is younger immediately changes the whole stream of conversation? The first and most logical suspicion falls on the guy - he, most likely, is not matured morally and does not understand anything in life, a kind of chick who had fallen out of the nest the day before and is now looking for a nurse.
We were told at school that girls mature faster than boys, so we remembered this simple truth for the rest of our life: men with mental and physical development follow us, and we proudly head the “column”
The next guess falls on the woman herself - in her, probably, the maternal instinct awoke if she picked up the “kid” for herself instead of the “normal” man. And even if the “kid” is already over 30, and she is 45 years old, the formula “mother-son” still climbs into her head with all the patronizing links that follow (“she probably pays for him”, “he definitely lives with her” ).The version about the material benefit from the youth will not take long to wait - well, we cannot imagine that a young, handsome guy will agree to meet with a woman older than himself "just like that." We see this as a subtle calculation in the form of a dodger who uses his appearance, who with all his strength wants to strengthen himself at the expense of a more successful lady, which means that he does not just run after her, but hunts for money, living space, wants to drive her classroom To bang on Sunday at someone else's expense.
Fortunately, our society is already quite liberal, and at the final stage of the discussion there is a version about sex, especially if the photo from Tinder shown to the public is beyond doubt - this is a handsome man. And here would be here to be happy for a girlfriend and ask about the juicy details ... but no, the boring conclusions begin that the boy is used solely for the sake of sex, but he will not fit even more.
One cannot hide from such a “people's court”, so that women themselves begin to apologize for having brought such a thing to themselves, to justify their “strangeness” compared to the rest almost until they recognize their own inferiority or at least a fateful bad luck.They say, well, I like the young and energetic, and all the decent "adults" in my age category are already busy. Men with a tum and a bald head, having got young mistresses for themselves, and they don’t lead with an ear, in order for some to provide explanations. But a woman with a young, sexy, tanned one can not be excused, there must be a good reason, otherwise it is contrary to social norms. Desperate dislike for flabby, lazy and passive men of his age or unexpected mutual passion flared as an excuse is not accepted, there should be a drama that pushed her out of the generally accepted scenario, otherwise it can be.
But the story of the oppression of women who like younger men, goes back to the European Middle Ages, where they were given public humiliation or even violence for such a "wrong choice." At that time, the old men who chose minors as wives did not apply. If you look at today's world map, you will find that the less developed a society is, the younger the bride is in it. In Nigeria, for example, 15 years is quite an average age for a bride, while in the States they complain about the stigmatization of marriages where a woman is older when, according to statistics, those in the age group of women after forty already have almost 35%.In Europe, you rarely get to see the young, fifty-year-old "zhivchik" under the pen with a girl who just graduated from the institute, and we still have a certain standard of life or even a logical outcome of events in the current economic realities. They say that she needs a leader in the relationship, a “teacher” and an assistant in life, and better, financial support, and for this set of qualities, a man is completely allowed to buy someone's youth. With her, in exchange for "bonuses", not so much is required - to please an adult husband and fulfill his maternal duty.
It turns out that women's youth is not for women, but for someone else: for men, for children (“the sooner you give birth, the better”). Male youth is only for men, they fully own it and fully control it. Women's youth - by definition, it should be meek, innocent, problem-free (from “don't climb trees” to “don't walk, like a prostitute”). The male youth is allowed to be dashing, crazy, absurd, and later he will come to his senses, become more mature and settle down. Hence, the young lover or wife is the desired sexual object, and the young lover is like a grenade without checks, from which you can expect anything.
Female youth, according to public covenants, must be preserved, and chase after her if she leaves to look like 18 years after 30. A man's youth can be squandered briskly, noisily and in fifth gear, earning a couple of scars, bad habits, and even an illegitimate child. Therefore, the young mistress turns into a kind of fetish, such a must have for a man of any age, and an adult woman is seen as a second-rate product, which the young lover would dare to even say that her wrinkles are too much and the priest has sagged. It's because of these sad dogmas that we ourselves are afraid to be with the young and beautiful, because they have hollowed themselves that they are unworthy, that they should not want to dissuade such and such, trying to find in their love story a criminal immoral trick. And it's a pity, because female solidarity in this case could just "lay down" the male permissiveness, because having a young lover or a boyfriend means only having a lover or boyfriend, and everything else is medieval nonsense, which has long ceased to be cultivated .
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